About the double posts from yesterday...

I was having issues with connections yesterday. BUT at least I got something posted. Each were a little different so I left them both on. Actually when I got here this morning, I had 5 - 6 from yesterday. But some were just exact replicas of the first one.

Well, I survived Thanksgiving, brother's house and all.

Actually, it went much better than I expected it to. My brother, as I have mentioned before, is sort of a jerk. Also, I usually feel fairly outcast from my family. I don't really fit in very much. Most of them are very outgoing, and I'm very quiet most of the time. I don't feel like they understand me very well, and I seem to be more of a curiosity than a relative. But my brother was nice to me, and he even told me I should stay longer... which was very strange. But, not wanting to tempt fate, I left before he could turn "Hyde."

I hope everyone had a decent holiday!

Well, I survived Thanksgiving...

Actually, my brother was quite nice to me. It was weird. Normally he's a real jerk. He even asked me to stay longer, but I wanted to get out before I tempted fate and it turned ugly.

I'm seriously thinking about going back to working 2 jobs. I don't like being broke, and I want to be able to actually buy some Christmas presents this year. SO, if I get 2-3 paychecks before Christmas, that would take care of that. I like buying Christmas presents... then I just have the problem of finding time to shop. I think if I went back, I'd only work one day on the weekend instead of 2 so that I would have time to look for things.

I hope everyone had a half-way decent holiday.

I think I'm sick. Well, actually I know I am. Unfortunately when I get sick I don't eat, I don't sleep, and I don't drink anything... SO, the things you are supposed to do most of I don't do at all. So it takes me a while to get better. My sister brought me some medicines and I am going to take them.

Hmmm for those of you who I forgot to tell... Yes, I have a sister. Actually I have one full brother, 3 step brothers, one step sister, and one adopted step sister. It can get confusing at times. When I refer to my brother I am talking about the only real brother I have. He's a jerk, so I try not to refer to them. When I refer to my sister, I am talking about the adopted step sister. I'm actually closer to her (periodically) than my brother. She has issues. It was very very sweet of her to bring me medicine though. She brought me natural antibiotics and some essential oils to use at night on my temples. I hope it works. I can't take cold medications.

At any rate...

I am going to take some time this week, I hope to actually dig out some writing and work on it. I've done a few others in the last few months and I need to work on them. I'm finding that the busier I am, the more the writing gets pushed to the back burner and I really don't like that. I'm not happy when I'm not doing it, but I'm not free enough to do it. So, not a promise, but a goal.

Brian is telling me that I need to enter more contests. I don't know that I want to spend the money on them right now. It would be nice to win one though...

Walking

I think I would like to go for a walk. Put my sneakers on, and trek across the hills at my parents house. When I lived there 10 years ago, I could take off across the field, and cross a few fences and not hit another house for a good 1/2 hour. That was nice. I like to walk. It makes me feel better, and clearer. Unfortunately, most people don't like to walk with me. Most people feel that I take my walks at a run. I just don't see a point in leisurely strolls. The purpose of my walk is not to visit the sights of nature, and appreciate their glory. If I were doing that I would take a blanket out and lay on the ground and see it all at eye level and be still. The purpose of my walk is to breathe the fresh air and clear my mind of all the clutter and cobwebs that set up shop when I am cooped indoors too much.

10 years later, the area where my mother lives is still very sparsely decorated with houses, but more and more have risen up. No more 1/2 hour walks away from civilization. The little valley where I could stand and scream now faces a beautiful 2 story house.

Perhaps I shall have to be contented walking along the streets of the city where I live and keeping my voice to myself.

In my little header thing for my blog, I have written "The philosphy and otherwise irrelavent ramblings of a struggling poet." This seems to be a bit misleading right now. Sometimes it's not so irrelavent. I also haven't been doing much poeting of late. Whining, moaning, crying, complaining, things of that sort, but not really much poeting... course sometimes it's hard to tell the difference.

I wrote a bit of something the other day. I've written here and there, but much of it is incoherently personal and won't be seen by anyone else. There are lots of things that need to be reworked and reworded and looked over. Since I have weekends off now, I should take the time to do that.

Then again, there's that whole "should take the time" issue again...

I already have 2 major projects set for this weekend, so I don't think it will take place then. There's also the small matter of finding everything. I had it all nicely organized before the virus hit this spring. Now I need to find it all again.

I'm told that I'm at my comic best while complaining profusely about work and stupidity in general....

Favorite stupid exchange of the day:

Me: Do you have your title commitment?

Moron: Yes

Me: On Schedule B-2 where it shows the exceptions, the last number shows that this should be closing at our Fremont office.

Moron: I don't see that

Me: It should be on Schedule B-2. You said you have the commitment, correct?

Moron: Yes, I have it. But I don't see that.

Me: Are you looking at the commitment?

Moron: No.

Need I say MORE??!?!

People just make me tired.

I'm back in the closing department at work. In the absence of the other closer, the only closer left here requires a full time assistant... or at least she should. She doesn't, but that's because she is a control freak who likes to do everything herself. Keep in mind that I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with that...(lest anyone out there start making reference to pots and kettles and the varying shades of black of those.)

In the sunny side, that means I have a little more time to write, which is a good thing. My brain was sort of exploding for a bit. I've written bits and pieces down and I'm going to be swimming through them trying to make a bit of sense out of it. I think I just need to spend some time being still. I've felt as if I was riding a tornado for the last year and a half. I would like to land for a few minutes and rest.

I've taken a bit of time here and there, but it's always seemed a little restless and I think I could devote myself to taking time for times sake right now.

As a personal note to one reader... See!! I didn't let it drag me down too much. I didn't focus too much. I'm feeling better...

Happy Voting Day!

For those of you who hit the polls today, I hope you had a relatively stress free, and enjoyable voting day.

I had lunch with a friend that I see about once a year today. Normally politics never rears it's icky head in a conversation with me because I refuse to discuss it. However, I trust this particular friend enough to touch upon the subject and at least give my actual view on what and why I believe what I do about political stances, politicians, and politics in general.

My father is the mayor of the small town where he lives. My friend begain the discussion with "So, I saw your dad on TV the other night... And well... I didn't want to say anything ... and forgive if this comes out wrong... but... well... the first thing that popped into my head was 'power trip.'" Of course I confirmed his belief and we launched off onto a political discussion as to why I make the conscious choice not to vote. Yes, it is a conscious choice. I think that this year is the first year I've admitted to the actual choice, but you know... call a spade a shovel--no matter what it's made for digging.

There is a lot to the choice. For one thing, my family and I see completely opposite on politics and they are all about freedom of choice as long as you choose their way. For another, at the rate my life moves, I honestly don't think I have enough time to pay attention closely enough to make a properly informed decision. I refuse to vote for something when I don't know exactly what it is about, or for someone (with the proper pronounial changes) for that matter. It's not that I'm afraid I'll make the wrong choice, it's that I'm not making MY choice. And when you work as much as I do and have as much going on as I do, you tend to not have much time to pay attention to the issues. In a nutshell and on the surface, that's the basic gist of why I make that choice. At some point (possibly soon) I will read up on political theory and pay more attention to what is going on around me. Up to this point, I've just barely kept my head above water with school and work and all the other issues that are previously mentioned in this blog surrounding me. So, don't be too hard on me... I don't complain about the administration that I didn't vote for either... I figure that if I didn't choose it... I can't complain.

That's the closest to a political rant I've ever done, I think.